I know I am supposed to wait till she is in her cage but I want to hold her at night

Night time? Holding?
Not my gliders, none of them. Night time is active time, run, jump, climb, explore, taste, then run some more.

During the day I can pull out the sleeping pouch and put my hand in it and let them sleep with my hand. or I can put them in bonding pouch, or my shirt and let some sleep in my shirt.

If you can't pick up glider that is not bonded or he won't climb on you. then start with a short visit during the day, I use fleece as a glove if they bite still and put in bonding pouch zip it up. At first I recommend 2 hours then back into cage. Unbonded gliders can be fast so you have to be quick if they are out of the sleeping pouch.