I bought a one year old sugar glider from a family in Tennessee. The dad is in the army and they’re planning to be restationed so they had to give him up, which of course is me. I’ve had him for about 5 weeks now and I’m not seeing any signs of bonding whatsoever. This also was a problem for the family too because they had him since he was a baby and they had trouble with him bonding with the family. As a matter of fact, we went backwards. I thought all was going well after the first few weeks. But then things fell apart and I’m not sure why. I feed him daily with the nutritious pellets along with a fresh cut apple slice which he absolutely loves along with almonds a treat. I usually give him an almond for coming out. But in order for him to come out I have to get him out of his pouch, which he spends about 98% of the time in there and he hardly plays with his toys. Every time I even approach him too close he crabs at me. Every time I wanted to spend time with him he’d bite me so I used the carrying pouch as a glove to get him out because that’s an advice I read online and figured it was a good idea without thinking of the negative result. The carrying pouch he didn’t mind going into he now hates it because I used it as a glove. Every time I’d take him out he would shake and run to my back so that I couldn’t reach him. More than often I would just leave his cage open so that he could venture out, but he prefers to be in his cage all the time.


Idk where this resentment came from because I’ve never abused him or anything. I’ve tried everything from having my sock in his sleeping pouch, my shirt draped over his cage, constantly feeding him treats, and I constantly sweet talk to him throughout the day to just check on him. I’m all out of options and I’m losing hope in bonding with him and it makes me pretty sad and disappointed to feel unappreciated by something that I’ve done nothing but given him love. Even when I just stick my hand inside his cage very subtly he would get really iffy and sometimes he’ll do back flips which I understand that is resulted from anxiety. I would have a treat in my hand he would sniff it out, and if it looked like I was using it to lure him out then he’d back off instantly. Now I just don’t even try to take him out because it’s become such a struggle, and it continues to deeply sadden me.

If nothing gets resolved then I’ll have no choice but to give him up as well. I prefer not to go that route because the transition to another owner may hurt the owner’s chances of bonding with him.

So if anyone could help me with this issue I’d really appreciate it.

Ok, lets see. first cut out the almond. I hear that is bad for their teeth or could get impacted and cause mouth issues. Switch treats to yogurt drops(I buy online) or dried mealworms (petstore or walmart in bird section) or live mealworms (I get at petstore). these are great treats and your glider will be happy you are giving them to her/him.

For bonding, with a glider that old and not bonded, it may take some time, 5 weeks maybe way to short of a time, specially if your using the best bonding technics. FORGET ABOUT HIM CRABBING, IGNORE IT FOR A LONG TIME. I have a glider I can scoop up is not happy but as soon as she is in sleeping pouch and gets scared she crabs. Some gliders are real scardy cats and crab a ton so FORGET ABOUT IT, DONT LET IT BOTHER YOU!!
I feel gliders are much more scent driven, so you can talk the them, but I dont think that will do much.

things I would do.
I would take sleeping pouch, with glider sleeping inside it, and take to my glider safe small bathroom 8' by 3'. try to have something in the room for them to investigate, toy, treat, wheel. I would let glider stay in sleeping bag for a short time, then force it out of the bag and put sleeping pouch out of reach for glider. I would sit with glider and just watch him explore. Hope that he jumps on me and explores me. I would do this 1 hour per day or so. As he gets less scared you can put your hand in front of him in a LOW position, let him sniff your scent.
you can do this at night or day, but at day he will be in sleeping pouch, so you DO NOT have to catch him.
With live mealworms I shake the container so they know that sound is live mealworm time!!

next time put bonding pouch in cage with treat, and remove him from sleeping pouch and remove sleeping pouch, he will go into bonding pouch, zip it up and put it on you.

some very good videos online. lilly bell and izzy silver has some good ones.

Remember to keep trying, it can take some time.
Also I would recommend the Ohpw/critterlove diet or BML diet if you plan on keeping your little guy.

Yea, I agree with BYK_Chainsaw on ignoring the crabbing. One of my glider is a crabber and crabs at everything. I think her life motto is, "Just crab it."

When she hears, see or feels anything she's not familiar she just crabs. Even as we're now semi-bonded, she crabs whenever I touch her pouch on the outside, until I put my hand in and show her it's me. When I bring her food, she crab and lunges at the food, gulping and slurping it down, even though she was just crabbing at it a sec earlier.

"Resentment" or fear, may come from prior experience. More work, but it'll be more rewarding when you experience your milestones later =)

I know 5 weeks feels like a long time to you, but unfortunately it is not. I've had my crabber for 9 months now. There are improvements, but she's still not completely at ease with me. Some days, she's comfortable with sleeping with my hands, other days my hands are her worst enemies. While my other glider is naturally mild and sweet natured, cuddles in her sleep and all those things.

5 weeks isn't that long regardless of the gliders age, and a year old is not that old. The glider is still getting acclimated to it's new environment and humans at this point.

Crabbing is normal and yes can be startling and intimidating, that's part of the point of crabbing.

Take a look at things from the gliders perspective. You have just been given to someone new, live in a new environment, smells different, sounds different, the human is different everything the glider knew is different and it doesn't know what you want or what your going to do it, you might even want to eat it for all it knows.

Imagine a giant considerably bigger than your self, has just reached into your "cage" ( your bedroom) through the window and is trying to catch you and pick you up. It catches you and sticks you in a big sack and zips it up. Then the giant wanders around, your trapped, and swinging back n forth in the giant sack. You don't know where the giant is taking you or what it's going to do with you.

Would you not be afraid? scream? yell? be defensive? bite the giants fingers?
If you think you are frustrated imagine what your glider feels like.

Trust is going to have to be earned and you are going to have work for it.

Take a deep breath, and begin again. Get on a routine. Be consistent with the routine.

I don't care how old the glider is, what it's history was it is NEVER to late or un achievable if you invest the time and effort that the glider needs.

It's going to take commitment on your part. Time and energy and frustration and disappointment and set backs are all part of it, use it and learn from it so you and the glider can move forward from it. Sometimes we take a few steps back before we can get one step forward. That's not a failure, it's a work in progress so don't give up on the glider, or yourself.

What kind of cage does the glider have?

What kind of toys?

Does the glider have a glider safe wheel?

what exactly is your routine? do you get him out randomly or at a specific time?

are you trying to take him out at night? or during the day?

How do you usually get him in the bonding bag?

how long is he in the bonding bag and what are you doing while he's in the bonding bag?

His diet could use improvement, pellets and a slice of apple does not provide enough nutrients a glider needs. Critter love hpw's and Bml are two widely used diets.

Almonds. Don't cause dental issues. There are however other things they do cause problems with. Almonds/nuts/seeds do not break down or digest easily. Gliders teeth are not designed to eat nuts and seeds, they are designed for compression to press the juice out of foods so the glider can swallow the juice and spit out the pulp. Sort of like a juicing machine for humans. Nuts and seeds get scrapped by gliders teeth, not chewed, ground or broken down at all. This can cause blockage in the digestive track and or constipation. It's difficult to treat, and heartbreaking to watch the glider suffer.

Personally, I wouldn't be putting my hand in the cage unless you are cleaning, taking the glider out or putting him back in or feeding/clearing plates.

The cage is his first safe place and your hand lingering in there for no reason is invading his space. Show him that you respect his home, and his safe place. Out of the cage is where I interact with my gliders, when they are in the cage that is their time to do as they please without me intruding.

With new to me gliders ( at any age ) I always get them on a routine first and foremost. Every day ( for me about 10 am ) I go to the cage talk to the glider as I approach, open the door, remove the sleep pouch and take the glider to my bed. Give the glider a treat and offer the bonding bag. I do this by holding the glider with one hand and pulling the top of the pouch down so the glider is at the top of the sleep pouch then offer the open bonding bag and let the glider walk in the bonding bag, give another treat and close the boding bag. If I'm going to be active I put the bonding bag down my shirt so it's not swinging around.

This my routine every day until the glider gets used to me, approaching the cage, opening the door, taking the glider out, getting the glider in the bonding bag. Once used to it, the gliders voluntarily go into the bonding with no fuss. They learn my routine, the time of day and what to expect. But you have to be consistent. Gliders are much like toddlers when it comes to consistency. Be confident when you handle the glider if your nervous the glider will be too, if your scared the glider will be more scared. If YOU are confident and calm the glider will begin to be confident and calm too.

Hi Matt,

You've received absolutely excellent advice from BYK_Chainsaw, Effsan, and Leela that I'm sure you'll find extremely helpful! The only thing I wanted to add was to let you know, like others here, I totally understand your frustration and sadness because of your gliders slow bonding. My second glider has been much slower to bond than my first and it has often led me to tears. I ask myself questions like what am I doing wrong and why does she seem to hate me when all I have done is love her? "Biting the hand that feeds you" has never been more true! There are times I feel like giving up but then I remember a plaque that my mom gave to my brother and his wife when they were expecting their first child. The plaque said "children need love most when they deserve it the least". The same could be said of pets, including sugar gliders of course. Your precious little one is scared, having been rehomed and getting used to new people and surroundings. Please don't give up on him. He is depending on you for unconditional love, care, and acceptance.

My newest glider has been with me for almost 10 months and she is not as cuddly as my first. But that's ok. Like people, gliders are individuals, with their own personalities and temperaments. Patience, time, and love will go a long way and I have no doubt your devotion will pay off...maybe not in the way you hope or expect, but the rewards far outweigh the work!

"children need love most when they deserve it the least"

How true! This brought tears to my eyes for so many reasons.

Last Sat, Ellie had a panic attack when our cleaner knocked something over in their room clashing loudly against the cage. She ran frantically in the cage. I wanted to take her out and calm her down, she was too frighten that she chomped down hard on my thumb. Blood oozes out like mad, this is a first good proper chomp in history. Blood smeared all over her blankie.

I was.... pissed was not the word. Initial reaction is I would love to fling her out the window After I calmed down, I wrapped her up in her blood smeared (my blood) blankie and tugged her into the pouch. And i told her "There, sleep with my blood!"

30mins later I came back to check on her, she had climbed out of her pouch, was hanging on to right top corner of the cage, trying to be as small as possible and shivering. Effie was in the pouch with her head popped out looking very dazed. Looking at Ellie like that I felt pity and a lil bit of love (still pissed). I took her out, with some protest, put her in bonding pouch with Effie, and tugged the pouch with both of them under in between my pjs which I normally hang behind the door of my bedroom. I felt Ellie calmed down and left. When the cleaner left 2 hours later, I came back to check on them and they were sound asleep. I put the bonding pouch back into the cage.

So yea, they are times when I feel the journey hit rock bottom, but when the reward comes, it's worth it. Like when they are sleeping in their bonding pouch, and when you put your hands in the pouch, when they open their eyes, look at you, lick at your finger and went back to sleep. So sweet!

This morning when I feed them leftover BML before I left for work, Ellie was licking off my finger with eyes closed and holding my finger like a milk bottle. That blood sucker definitely has her sweet side, so does all sugar gliders.

Thanks for sharing that story, Effsan. Made me laugh and cry and is a good reminder that we all can relate to as we go through challenging times while also savoring the love and joy that our gliders give. The only time my little one bit me that hard I took my bloody finger and held it in front of her screaming "look what you did to me!" I'm not sure she understood, but it felt important to do at the time.

Thank you everyone for your insightful input on the matter. I really appreciate the suggestions you all have provided.

Here’s another question. Even when he crabs at me and still continues to hang out inside his sleeping pouch, should I get him to go into his bonding pouch without it being on his own terms? Because if I let it be on his terms he won’t ever even come out of his cage or the sleeping pouch.

Also, tonight I got him into his bonding pouch. Not on his own accord because he crabbed and tried to get away from the pouch I use as a glove. When I managed to get him inside the pouch he looked super terrified and it seemed like he was petrified while laying on his back and not moving his limbs. Another thing that was unusual I stuck my finger inside the pouch and he didn’t even crab nor tried to bite me, rather he let me pet him. He shakes in his pouch too. I’m getting mixed signals whether he’s letting me pet him because he’s bonding or because he’s so terrified that he won’t even try to protect himself. Idk, maybe I’m reading too much into it, though he’s given me no reason not to.

Hello Matt, I'll try to answer your qs more specifically, section by section, extracting useful info from those who had answered you previously. Please read and digest.

Fundamental
Firstly, it'll do well to digest and answer Leela's questions, because they are not only fundamental but decisively important.

1. What kind of cage does the glider have?

2. What kind of toys?

3. Does the glider have a glider safe wheel?

4. What exactly is your routine? do you get him out randomly or at a specific time?

5. Are you trying to take him out at night? or during the day?

6. How do you usually get him in the bonding bag?

7. how long is he in the bonding bag and what are you doing while he's in the bonding bag?

Most first time glider owner (and I'm talking also about myself), take in gliders hoping for a loving relationship. We look forward for their attachments and their snuggles. It's a natural desire. However, from the lil guy's point of view, how would he give you love (or even trust) if he (the glider)

1. Is not happy with his home
2. Felt confined in a boring space
3. Is not sure of the intention of this giant that comes in every now and then glaring into my home
4. Is wary of this giant that acts unpredictably (if you do not have a routine)
5. Is fearful of how this giant tears me out of the cage

For the lil guy to lower his fear, first and foremost you must prove yourself CONSISTENTLY safe. He must be able to see that you are his RELIABLE source of yummy food, and that you will never hurt him. Try not to do random things. Unpredictability is scary.

Getting Glider into Bonding Pouch
BYK_Chainsaw had explained very wonderfully here that it is not necessary to transfer the glider into a bonding pouch.

"I would take sleeping pouch, with glider sleeping inside it, and take to my glider safe small bathroom 8' by 3'. try to have something in the room for them to investigate, toy, treat, wheel. I would let glider stay in sleeping bag for a short time, then force it out of the bag and put sleeping pouch out of reach for glider."

I don't use alot of bonding pouch myself in the day. I'm working mostly and only home on weekdays. On a Sat / Sun afternoon, I take detach my gliders' sleeping pouch, put it on my lap and sit on my couch / bed for 30-60mins watching something on my Ipad.

I do the same thing when I want to bring them out for play time in the night. I detach their sleeping pouch and bring the pouch into the tent.

Additionally, people rarely do bonding pouch at night. Night time should be the glider's alert and active time. Encourage him to play. Bonding pouch is normally a day time thing, for owner to carry the gliders around, so they can sleep in the pouch close to the owner's scent.

Stroking Glider in the Pouch
I used to read in an older post where BYK_Chainsaw advised on making a fist before putting your hand into the pouch. Yes he might crab, yes he might lunge and yes he might bite. Making a fist does make it so much harder to bite. I will leave my fist in there for about 5-10 mins or until my gliders calm down, and slowly relaxed my fist, resting it on the gliders. Same case if he looks defensive or terrified.

In the day, mostly they might just curl up and go back to sleep or in the night, they might relaxed, sniff around and start venturing out of the pouch.

I did this for 2-3 weeks before actually stroking or cupping them with my hands in the pouch.

Glider Safe Space
You mentioned that your glider tend to venture out, run around and back your body where you can't reach.

Question, do you have a glider safe space where he can explore at his own term?

Back to what BYK_Chainsaw had illustrated about bonding time, detach the sleeping pouch from the cage, bring the pouch and your glider to your glider safe space, urge him out of the pouch and let him explore. Have some treats.

IF he wants to hang around on your back, then so be it. Let him be. If he jumps off you to explore the tent, let him. If he's nearby, tempt him with some treats, but don't force the treats on him. One day when he realize you're not a threat but dispenser of treats, he WILL warm up.

Ultimately, routine (consistency) and patience is the key. No short cuts. Unfortunately, these cuties are not born to love us. We need to earn their trust, reliance and ultimately love (if ever).

All the best.